If Hogwarts had an ICT & Network Engineering Certification

Totally random post I know, but just imagine if the Hogwarts curriculum included a certification in ICT & Networking.  Obviously keyboar...


Totally random post I know, but just imagine if the Hogwarts curriculum included a certification in ICT & Networking.  Obviously keyboards are for Muggles, so just what kind of spells would one need to master to pass this class?

Here's a definitive list

  • Pingifyus Totalus: A spell to send a comprehensive network ping to every device in the subnet.
  • Pingus Respondium: A spell to ensure all devices respond to pings instantly.
  • Latencium Reducio: A spell to reduce network latency to negligible levels.
  • Packetus Maximulus: A spell to send the maximum number of packets in a single ping.
  • Timeouterus Preventus: A spell to prevent any network timeouts from occurring.
  • Jitterus Nullify: A spell to eliminate all jitter in the network.
  • Traceroutus Revelio: A spell to reveal the entire route taken by packets across the network.
  • Echoicus Infinitium: A spell to send an endless series of echo requests to a device.
  • Firewallus Bypassium: A spell to temporarily bypass firewall rules for a quick network test (use with caution!).
  • Bandwidthium Amplifico: A spell to temporarily boost network bandwidth for a short period.
  • Dropus Preventio: A spell to prevent any packet drops during transmission.
  • Interferus Negatus: A spell to negate any interference affecting the network signal.
  • Networkus Discovero: A spell to discover and map out all devices connected to the network.
  • Congestionus Avoidus: A spell to reroute traffic to avoid network congestion.
  • Routerus Refresho: A spell to refresh and reset routers and switches without downtime.
  • Uptimeus Eternalis: A spell to ensure perpetual network uptime.
  • Disconnectus Repelium: A spell to repel any unwanted disconnections.
  • Throughputus Maximus: A spell to maximize network throughput for optimal performance.
  • Addressus Conflictus Vanish: A spell to resolve IP address conflicts instantly.
  • Subnetus Revealio: A spell to reveal the details of any subnet in the network.
  • Pingus Parallus: A spell to ping multiple devices simultaneously.
  • Duplexus Correcto: A spell to fix duplex mismatches between devices.
  • Broadcastium Isolato: A spell to isolate broadcast traffic and prevent storms.
  • Domainus Synchrono: A spell to synchronize all domain controllers in a forest.
  • DNS Resolvius: A spell to instantly resolve DNS queries without fail.
  • Latencyum Nullificus: A spell to nullify any latency spikes in the network.
  • Throughputum Monitoro: A spell to monitor network throughput in real-time.
  • VLANus Organizo: A spell to organize and manage VLAN configurations effortlessly.
  • Malwareus Expellius: A spell to expel any malware attempting to infiltrate the network.
  • Topologyum Viewius: A spell to visualize the entire network topology at a glance.
  • Spoolus Clearo: A spell to clear all print spooler issues on the network.
  • Portus Checkum: A spell to check the status of all network ports instantly.
  • Signalum Strengthium: A spell to boost wireless signal strength across the network.
  • Bandwidthus Allocateo: A spell to allocate bandwidth dynamically based on current needs.
  • Servus Restartus: A spell to restart servers gracefully without disrupting services.



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Auki Henry: If Hogwarts had an ICT & Network Engineering Certification
If Hogwarts had an ICT & Network Engineering Certification
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