Every now and then a song lands in your ears and immediately makes you think, “Wait, where has this been every Christmas?” That’s pretty m...
Every now and then a song lands in your ears and immediately makes you think, “Wait, where has this been every Christmas?” That’s pretty much what happened when I hit play on Elevator Primates’ new festive banger “All I Got for Christmas Was Detention.”
Yep, you read that right. The title alone deserves a gold star and possibly a formal complaint from Santa. And yep they purposely dropped this on the last day of July according to this post by their social media manager, but the song itself? It's a glorious dose of bratty pop-punk joy that I didn’t realise my holiday playlist was missing, at least since Blink182's "I Won't Be Home for Christmas"
From the opening guitar riff to the lyrical chaos of candy canes, bad advice, and festive misbehaviour, it’s got all the ingredients of a Christmas classic, just rearranged by someone who’s clearly spent some time in the principal’s office.
Musically, it sounds like Blink-182 snuck into the nativity scene, knocked over the tree, and started a snowball fight. There’s crunch, melody, humour, and energy. It’s sharp, stupid, and kind of brilliant in the best way possible.
Let’s be honest: most Christmas songs are either too syrupy or too safe. This one? It gives Christmas the same energy your cousin Brad brings after too much spiked eggnog and one bad decision. And we need more of that IMHO.
The Elevator Primates boys nailed the tone I reckon, funny without being a parody, chaotic without being noise, and still tight musically. Plus, “NAUGHTY. TWICE.” deserves to be on t-shirts everywhere, expecting they'll already be working on that merch item before the end of the year.
If you’ve ever wanted a holiday song that won’t make your ears bleed after the 5th listen in December, or you just want something loud to drown out Mariah, this might be the one for your playlist.
COMMENTS